Journaling in the Chapel

Article By Kay Dumesnil, OCDS, of the San Juan de la Cruz Community in Houston, TX

While in the Chapel after Mass this morning, a feeling of warmth came over me. Like being warmed by a heat, a magnificent flame, I began to think what a gift it was to be here in the presence of my Creator and His faithful Missionary Carmelites of St Teresa. Talking to God, I asked, why do you love me? Why have you given me such a wonderful environment to grow in Carmelite spirituality?

How can you love me when I abandon you so often for worldly things. Let me focus on your Divine love for me. Please hold my hand when I falter. Lead me on the new path. Guide me towards the things that bring meaning to my soul. When I am down and my heart is heavy, lift me up in your arms. When I fall and stumble, forgive my ways. As I weary from sorrow, let me take rest in your arms, remembering your cross, 'love's crimson emblem' as St. Therese of Lisieux has said.

May I practice 'determinacion' as prompted by St. Teresa of Avila in my quest to enrich my soul, to make it beautiful for you, God. May I remember St John of the Cross saying, 'put love where there is no love'....and grow in compassion for others.

When I am low in spirit may your love hover over me like glowing embers on the hearth beckoning me to the inner recesses of your heart. Then when I soar with the eagles in joy and laughter may your magnificent flame flare vividly around me sharing my vibrant nature.

May I strive to be a representative of your love towards others. May I truly be humble and consider it an honor to be your follower. Give me strength to persevere in my intentions. Thank you God for loving me!